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Desirable difficulties
When you are placed in a situation that is not ideal, the trick is to distance yourself from your thoughts on the situation. The situation is neither good nor bad. It just is. Think about how you will feel about the situation in the far future. This helps to minimize its significance.
In addition, there are things that Malcolm Gladwell calls ‘desirable difficulties’. These are difficulties that people are forced to cope with that with enough time and perspective become desirable. They are difficulties that force you to act a certain way, which due to the situation is different than the course of action others take.
There are certain advantages to be gained from this. One example Gladwell gives is that a much higher proportion than the general population of US Presidents lost a parent at a young age (I believe Obama was the most recent). These were undoubtedly desirable difficulties, and look where it got them.
I also like to think of these not ideal situations as a way of finding out what you want to do. If a situation is not ideal for you, it gives you an idea of what would be ideal, which gives you a goal to work towards.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Hi, I’m Tim Bunting AKA the Kiwi Yamabushi, a New Zealander who became a Yamabushi Ascetic in the Dewa Sanzan mountains of north Japan. I’m part of the Yamabushido team, and we host life-altering Yamabushi training on the Dewa Sanzan (website link). People come to us for the ultimate mindfulness experience, to reach the next level, or simply connect with nature and themselves.
I’m on a mission to summit all 100 Famous Mountains of Yamagata Prefecture to spread the splendour of this fabulous location, and in dedication to all those who lost their lives out in nature, including my father.
On my daily blog I post thoughts of a practicing Yamabushi that I hope people can use to better themselves and live as fulfilling a life as possible.
Sign up to the weekly Mountains of Wisdom newsletter, follow me on social (Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, TikTok, Clubhouse, all @kiwiyamabushi), or send me an email via the link below to stay in touch.
Tim.
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