Daily Yamabushi

I don’t know many other people who read this, but Dan Ariely’s Ask Ariely column is really good! For those who don’t know, he’s a behavioral economist that shows us that we are anything but rational beings. Anyway, I remember reading there a while back that you should spread out new things if you can.

He suggests, for example, that you shouldn’t buy a new car and move into a new house at the same time. The reason being the feeling you get with new things sort of combines, and would be better spread out over time to make the most of the feeing.

So I was a bit surprised recently when my wife got angry at me for opening and using a wooden tissue box holder we had bought. She wanted to save it for our move to our new house, which at the time was a few months away. But I’m glad I opened it and used it for the reason above 🙂

By definition, creative means something new, meaning something that has never been done before. Therefore, to do the creative we have to leave the comfort of the known and venture into the chaos of the unknown.

Being able to produce something out of the chaos takes real creativity. In other words, creativity demands chaos.

We often hear of creatives and even sports people say they were in the zone, and that’s how they were able to do the remarkable. This zone is obviously not our regular life, if it were we’d all be on a creative frenzy.

I believe to make the most out of this ‘zone’ (which for the record I believe is all in our heads), we have to take to it head on, no hesitation, and no distraction. As the famous Nike slogan says, Just do it.

When I was 14 I played a waterpolo tournament as the goalie. One of the highlights was scoring a goal against the eventual winners (which isn’t an easy feat for a goalie, it’s a 20m throw that has to get past the keeper), but there was one trick I used that stopped at least five goals in the tournament.

When a player has a break, and there’s a one on one with the goalie, instead of waiting for the player to approach, I would swim out to them and take the ball away. This worked at least once in the game because people don’t expect it, and they don’t generally keep an eye on the keeper, focusing on the ball in front of their eyes instead. However, my little truck never worked when I hesitated, even just the tiniest amount.

To pull this trick off, timing was extremely important, and any hesitation throws you off enough that the opposition can see it coming. It’s not enough to make a decision like this in the spur of the moment, you also have to convince yourself to go through with it, otherwise it’s not going to work. Which is to say, when you’ve decided to take an action, don’t back down. Take it head on. Hesitation only lowers your chances of success.

What advice do you have for your 20 year-old self? What advice do you have for your 30 year-old self? Have you ever asked yourself such questions? I got this from the Tim Ferriss podcast in case you’re interested, but one similar question I’ve been playing with is, would you recommend people copy the path you took, given the same opportunities? Because to be honest, I’m not sure I would.

This is all hypothetical of course, so it’s impossible to know for sure, plus it’s in the past, so we have the advantage of hindsight. However, there are some parts of my path that I would definitely recommend, for example going to Japan and going out and meeting a whole lot of people, and there are some parts I wouldn’t recommend, like binge drinking, which is somewhat related to the first part.

So, as a whole, I’m not sure I’d recommend my path, but unfortunately we have no choice. Our path is our path, and each decision has an impact on the next one, and that one the next and so on and so on. And so if you were to take the negative experiences out and just leave the positive ones, I’m not sure it would be the same. The negative experiences teach us things that we want to avoid doing, which in turn is a positive, right?

So I’d say, just enjoy it for what it is! Negative or positive, just being here and being able to experience it is positive enough for me 🙂 keep on keeping on!

Another disadvantage of being high in agreeableness is it’s easier to miss when people are messing with you, purposely or otherwise.

Put simply, competent people do it to take advantage of you, and because you are so trusting of them, you have to be very careful to realise it, and be firm when you stand your ground.

On the other hand, incompetent people who are well-meaning fool you into trusting them, and can drag you along in their incompetence. You want what’s best for them, but sometimes they simply lack the ability to perform well, and it can take longer to realise this if you are high in agreeableness.

It’s hard to know how to act in these situations, especially because they’re always different. But for those high in agreeableness, it pays to be a bit weary of other, lest you get dragged along whether purposely on their part or otherwise.

If you live in a place like this, where the natural environment dictates so much of your lifestyle, it’s only natural that you develop compassion for your fellow human beings.

For example, the snow makes the roads much narrower, which in a place with already narrow roads is a disaster. But everyone understands this, and there’s almost a competition to be the most considerate person to other people using the road.

At the same time, however, the environment makes getting around difficult, and so people spend excessive amounts of time indoors with the same people. This makes it harder to develop social skills, and people tend to keep to themselves more.

As a result, there is an insider outsider complex here. Anyone seen as an outsider is viewed with caution, naturally of course, and it takes a lot of effort to break the wall and become a true insider.

I think I have achieved that to a certain level here, and you’d hope so after 10 years, but I think a lot of that is due to the small parcels of openness that people inevitably offer, and then reciprocating in the right way.

Being closed off yourself is not good. People don’t respond well to that anyway, but especially here. This means you need to be inviting, but also cautionary to show a bit of your own weakness, a weakness that other people can see and want to help with.

Also, wanting to meet new people and actually listening to them goes a long way as well. I think a lot of my ability to listen is due to my agreeableness, which isn’t always a good thing, but it’s definitely helped me build relationships here.

Be kind, listen, and be compassionate. That would be my advice to those entering a new environment.

Tragedies help us better appreciate what we have. I was watching The Good Liar, which I recommend by the way, and it struck me that losing family members to war or sickness was still common in the not too distant past.

It made me think that although my dad has died and other family members are terminally ill, if I were to be alive about 100 years ago, or even more recent, then that wouldn’t have been too much of a special thing. And perhaps more importantly, people just got on with their lives.

Don’t get me wrong, I try not to let my situation interfere with my life anyway, but this realisation has helped me better come to terms with things, which has made it easier to not dwell on bad thoughts when they come up. In turn, I think I’m better able to appreciate some things that others aren’t, and that appreciation leads to a fuller life.

My practical suggestions from this are two-fold. There’s an exercise in stoicism where you imagine your life without certain loved ones to increase your appreciation of their existence. It might be worth giving that a try. Second, know that even if a tragedy were to occur, it helps you better appreciate what you do have, and I think knowing this will make the recovery process that much easier.

Every once in a while, try to go without something. I think that’s the main point of Lent, but it really does help you appreciate things when you have them, so you value them more than you normally would. Yamabushi training is a really good exercise in going without, but we haven’t been able to do that for a while now 🙁

Could you live without the internet? It’s now one of the essentials of daily life, and living without it is truly debilitating. Or so we make ourselves believe.

For the past 10 or so days we’ve been living without a home connection, we just moved into a new house and the wait is a month at the moment due to high demand. For work, I’ve had to go to my in-law’s, but thankfully it’s now very close. So I guess you could say I haven’t really been living without it, but the inconvenience is enough to make me appreciate when we had it!

I’ve had to adjust a bit, but I think it’s been in a good way. I’ve been reading more than I used to, and I’m more motivated to just sit down and write, there’s a backlog that I’ve been letting just build up, and this is the perfect chance to catch up. I’m going to have to try going without more often.

For me, sitting on the floor has always been one of the hardest parts of Yamabushi training. For those who are used to it, there’s nothing to it, like the Buddhist monk and yoga instructor I know who have no problem sitting in full lotus for hours on end.

That wasn’t the case for me, and I was always wriggling and squirming just so I could be somewhat comfortable, but that can bother other people, let alone myself, during training. So I decided to do something about it.

Since August last year, I have been doing the 21-day hip opening challenge on repeat. Since I haven’t been going out much, nor been doing Yamabushi training, I haven’t needed to sit on the floor as much, so I didn’t have anything to really gauge my progress.

Yesterday though, we had dinner at a Japanese restaurant (socially-distanced of course), and I had to sit on the floor. I’m happy to say that I have most definitely made progress. I can even do a half-lotus, which had never been possible.

Doing 15 minutes per day is not that much of a burden, especially if you make it a habit. In fact, I would highly recommend it! Now when I get up I don’t even think about it, I just go into the room with the yoga mat and begin, well after doing my Wim Hof breathing that is.

One important lesson I learned while being a Sendatsu Joshu (Master’s assistant) during Yamabushi training is that putting your house in order is a prerequisite for helping people. Part of that in regards to being a Yamabushi is being able to get ready to move in a short amount of time.

For beginners, there’s a lot to remember during Yamabushi training before you leave for the mountains. You have to remember how to wear the Shiroshozoku (white garments) properly, including the order you need to put things on. Get that wrong, and you may have to start over, a process of undoing which is by no means fast.

You also need to remember what to bring. Mountains are perilous places and they take proper preparation. As an assistant, it’s your job to make sure everyone is prepared, most importantly yourself.

Putting your house in order first has two main advantages; you can lead by example as others are able to copy you, which is the best thing you can do for them, and you can act swiftly if someone does need a little help, without the worry of whether you’re ready or not.

Jealousy is like not living in the moment. It’s limiting. It’s like living in a parallel time where things are what you want them to be, as opposed to a different past or future. Jealousy is dreamland. All we have is here, now, self, so why don’t we act that way?

More resilient. More grounded. More raw. No matter which way you look at it, 2020 has been a year to remember. 2020 has required more from us than any year in recent history, and that we have made it through is nothing short of a miracle.

The lessons from this year are ones we can never forget, but more than that I think the skills of perseverance, and the reassurance that together we can get through, are especially important parts to take with us as we move on into the future.

2020 is over. Let’s make it a year to remember for the right reasons.

You get some bleeding, you put on a bandage. Rinse and repeat. Temporary measures for temporary problems. So why don’t you just get a giant bandage? No more temporary problems, right? Well, bandages too are only meant to be temporary. Best to avoid bleeding in the first place.

Always have long term fixes in mind for temporary problems. It’s ok to use a bandage every once in a while, but sooner or later you’re going to have to stop the bleeding.

If only we didn’t have to stay inside… if only my family could visit normally… if only we could visit that restaurant again…

At this time of year, we typically get some time off to relax and spend as we please. But for most (well, maybe not those in NZ or Aussie), this year is going to be entirely different.

This not being able to celebrate the new year as per usual might seem like a burden or unnatural to some, and it’s only natural that feelings like this get in the way of what could have been.

There’s nothing we can do about the situation we are currently in, of course we can do something about the future situation, but this situation is what it is.

Even if we fool ourselves into thinking it’s an ordinary year, we will come across things that aren’t ordinary that will put a huge blemish on things. My advice is to embrace the situation for what it is.

So you may not be able to meet that uncle. So you may not be able to have the same meal you always have. So you may not be able to visit that restaurant. It’s undesirable, sure, but it’s not the end of the world.

Don’t let your regret about the situation ruin your experience. Don’t let it ruin your holiday. Embrace the experience for what it is, a new one. You’ll be glad you did.

How is it possible to be better than the people who do it well? In any endeavor, this question should always be in the back of your mind. And the answer is of course practice.

Watch what they do. Analyse it. Try to emulate it. At least get to their level. By doing this you have a greater chance of being better than them. Then, experiment. To be better than them, you have to be different. Try new approaches, because if you’re not doing so consistently, it’s easy for others to catch up, let alone yourself.

While practicing, don’t forget these two caveats:

1) Always focus on the now. Focus on what you’re doing at that particular moment. Not on your past when you couldn’t do anything, and not on your future self, except when trying to motivate, not while practicing.

2) Remember the beginners mindset. Come into every practice with a fresh set of eyes. This helps you see things in a new light every time, which makes it easier for you to pick up new things, and in turn stay humble.

To think is to have an opinion, and to have an opinion is to offend someone. And if you’re anything like me, and you’re at the ‘a’ on the agreeableness scale, it takes a lot of practice just to get your opinion out sometimes.

Personally, I find it really difficult to show disagreement with people (I also really hope I’m not misconstruing this scale), and I naturally want people to not necessarily agree with me, but stay on good terms.

However, sometimes this can be a real disadvantage. Sometimes you want so much not to offend people that you shut up or give non answers. In these cases, it might just be that you’re using your agreeableness as an excuse not to let your feelings known. In other words, you’re letting your shyness get the better of you.

For agreeable people especially, never hesitate to share your opinion out of fear of offending someone (unless it is actually harmful), because in most cases, you probably will anyway. To speak an opinion is to offend someone, to have an opinion and not speak it is a waste of human potential. Your opinion could tip the balance of a decision that has major implications for the future, so it helps if you can say it well. Just don’t let your shyness get the better of you.

Japan is famous for its toilets. That reputation can stick, although they aren’t by any means cheap. Maybe 6x what you’d pay for a standard toilet in NZ for one with all the bells and whistles.

The bathroom is really nice. With a bath that keeps the water warm that you can preset, and even use the waste water in the washing machine (you usually wash your body entirely before getting in the bath, so the dirt technically is off before you get in).

Probably also heat pumps, or aircon deserves a mention. Although there’s not much special about it besides cost performance I guess.

Then of course Japanese style rooms, you can’t get any better than in Japan, this ones pretty obvious.

Things that NZ do better are showers as opposed to bathrooms, lighting, aesthetics, kitchens, and garages in general. This is probably because there is more demand for them in NZ, rather than here in the countryside.

The internal access garage I’m still surprised by, it’s not the norm here in snow country, which just baffles me. Everyone parks outside and the majority of people have a car port. I think cost may come into it, because garages count towards the building size, and that means there’s more tax involved. But for the convenience, it’s more than likely worth it.

For the kitchens, NZ is much better. So much more choice, and things like dishwashers are so normal that they’re quite efficient and have good cost performance. Our dishwasher was expensive, and it’s not even that big. Smartfridges also, I’m yet to see one in Japan even at a shop.

Just a few notes after two nights living in a brand new Japanese house 🙂 which I love!

When working with people of the same industry on a joint project, for example to make a bigger pie, you have to be careful not to share too many secrets, of course, but also not to share too many of the same ideas. If you end up copying each other, which is fine for a while, you stop competing against one another as fiercely as you could be, and this affects the innovations that affect the industry as a whole. Best to always have some competition, some part of the pie to take. By all means make it bigger, but keep the competition alive!

I think I sit high in the scale of agreeableness, and this isn’t always a good thing. I find it really hard to say no to people a lot of the time, and sometimes I don’t let my true opinion out for fear of offending someone.

Not letting your true opinion out is a recipe for disaster. It’s an easy way for you to be pushed over, and may lead to resentment. Best to stand firm over your beliefs, even if it means discomfort in having to say no, and even if it means offending people. It’s ok you know, they’re just getting their feelings hurt, it’s part of being human!

Yesterday Nathan and I recorded an episode of Ikiguys, and for the first time we livestreamed it. I thought YouTube had a restriction where you needed 1,000 subscribers to do so, but it appears that isn’t the case if you use your computer at home. Which got me thinking, this is quite a powerful tool. The ability to share your ideas with whoever’s interested instantly and through video is quite remarkable. All you need is a computer with a decent Internet connection, and you too can make your own streaming powerhouse. Of course to make it something good, you’ll need to have good ideas, but part of being able to share ideas is having practice at sharing ideas, and what better place to start than a YouTube livestream?

For the past two years, I’ve been writing this blog religiously. It may not be the best quality, I’d say about 90% of the posts probably aren’t relevant to the majority of people, but there are some genuine gems in there that deserve greater thought, and posting them on YouTube might be a great way to do that, which is easily done with Livestreaming. Just like this blog, I’m thinking of doing a livestream each day. The aim has always been to improve my communication skills, and talking is one great way to do just that. I’m also thinking of other potential for this medium too, such as interviews with some of the people I’ve met during my time in Japan.

Now for the technical stuff, we went in with zero knowledge, and Nathan found a program called OBS that you can use for free to set up a stream. There were a few niggles of course, we couldn’t get Nate’s volume even with mine, and the video was a bit sketchy, so I’m going to have to do something about that in the future. However, it was easy enough, you connect feeds to OBS, share the stream key with YouTube, click start streaming, and you’re off to the races.

Now all I need is a decent Internet connection, which I’m going to have to wait for as we’re moving house, and right now the Internet companies are busy with high demand due to a little virus. Or is this just and excuse?

A few years ago, I bought a new phone. I had instant regret having spent more than $1000 on it, which I never imagined I’d do. But I figured I’d use it for at least five years like my last one (well, four years). However, within a week, I had dropped it and ruined the screen forever. Or so I thought.

The other week, I noticed a crack in the screen on my brand new GoPro. How could I be so careless? I thought. And as I was investigating, I realised that the screen protector had done its job. The only crack was on the protector and the screen was completely fine! Which made me think, maybe my phone screen wasn’t actually cracked.

And so, after more than two years of thinking I had a cracked phone screen, I checked it and I was of course wrong. The screen protector had done its job! But I had already given up hope for the longest time.

I just bought a new protector and put it on, it’s like new again! Sometimes we should really consider whether something is broken or not, we could be completely wrong and it could take two years to realise it!

Putting the reps in is a great way to improve, and there’s even legitimate reason to say it’s the only way. The secret then is to systemize the reps. Give yourself the least resistance possible to do the reps, and at the same time give yourself restrictions or rules that make you do them regularly.

I’m talking about writing. If you want to improve, make it as easy as possible to get your ideas out, for example a blog app on your phone, and give yourself restrictions or rules, such as one post a day.

However, this process could be used equally for exercise or other creative endeavors. In fact, I highly recommend it. Make it easy for you to do even just a little of something to improve daily or at least five times a week, and this makes it easier to keep up, and thus easier to put in the reps and improve.

Sporadic action leads to sporadic results. In the same vain, regular action leads to regular results. And by pushing yourself even just slightly more than the day before, you’ll be amazed at just how much you can improve.

One of the first things that you need to do when you learn a second language is to use it. A lot of people think that we learn second languages like we learn our first, by listening and then emulating. It doesn’t work like that, well it could, but it’s highly inefficient. Plus I think given the choice, babies probably would communicate using words.

Whenever you learn something new, some vocabulary or a phrase, maybe a grammar point, put it to use. Try and create something with it straight away.

There’s always going to be a lag between your receptive and productive second language ability. The more you learn, the bigger this lag gets because if your learning is efficient, you learn the most used language first, and this means the stuff you learn later on you have less of a chance of using, and thus less of a chance of using. To counteract this, use the language!

The most important thing about this receptive and productive lag is the part you can use, the productive part. This part you want to increase as much as possible so that your command of the language is greater. The only way to increase this productive part is by using the language. So you should be using it as soon as you can, including and most importantly at the beginning stages.

If you’re going to do something, do it properly. I’ve already said this about my experience with N1 on the Japanese Language Proficiency Test, but it’s equally true when you’re working in a team.

When you’re working in a team, your success is the team’s success, but equally the team’s failure is your failure. You have to do everything you can to see the team succeed, even if that means not taking credit, pulling the weight of others, or taking one for the team.

I’m of the belief that higher minimum wages are better for societies. People complain that they lead to small businesses not hiring , which I’m sure there is some truth to, but more than that it encourages small businesses to innovate and leads to more rewarding jobs for all.

Japan’s able to have so many people to show you where to park (Sakata city hall has at least three people to do this on any given day) and to stand outside construction sites for days on end because the wages are so low. Not to mention the banks that are still using 20th century management systems hiring for jobs that hardly exist anymore in countries with higher wages. Why not motivate businesses to innovate into finding better jobs for people rather than giving them jobs that robots/ computers could do? It’s going to happen sometime.

There will always be jobs, and the higher wage means they will be better ones at that. Even if you don’t agree with me, which is fine, do you know where the easiest place in the world is to become a millionaire? Hint, it’s not the US where the minimum wage is a pittance.

Unpopular opinion maybe but I don’t think form exists in sports and the like. If it were to exist it is entirely mental. Your performance on day one doesn’t magically carry on to day two, and thinking it does could be disastrous for any athlete.

In saying that, if you had a positive experience on day one, that positivity could brush off onto day two in a positive way, but I don’t think that has anything to do with your physical body.

I believe it was Roger Federer who has a method of hitting away the bad energy by physically swatting at his side, and this enables him to reset his mindset and start over. This is how it should be done, not some belief in something that is entirely imaginary.

When you’re feeling in a funk, don’t blame your form or the situation, do something to reset your mindset, your ‘form’ will be glad you did.

Life is struggle. That is the core understanding to be brought from Buddhism, and from that how we deal with it is up to us. When we finally feel like we have some respite, something new always seems to find its way into our lives. This is constant, and we need systems in place to deal with our feelings not only when they happen, but before they happen too.

We all deal with these struggles with some form of comfort. For many, that means Alcohol, Marijuana, food even. But in my experience, these drugs also do some irreparable damage. So, it helps to recognise these self-destructive tendencies, and to do something to deal with the struggle in a way that does not harm us.

There are many techniques we can use, my personal favourite is using our breath. Our breath is amazingly sensitive to these struggles. When I’m feeling stressed, I often find it hard to breath. In these times, I recognise this as stress, and force myself to relax. I sit down, and try to control my breath by breathing deeply 10 times. I find this in itself has amazing results, but it’s never enough.

Prevention is also important. That’s why I start every day with breathing techniques taught by Wim Hof. He also recommends the use of cold water therapy, either cold showers or sitting in ice baths, which admittedly I need to more of. Meditation is another great way to combat the struggle. It doesn’t need to be a certain way, simply sitting quietly and having thoughts pass through your mind, focusing on not focusing on them, is enough.

Another great teaching from Buddhism, and also Taoism, that comes from this core idea on struggle is that things are neither good nor bad, they just are. When we try to feel things as good or bad, that’s our ego talking, but if we can learn to just accept things as they are, we can better deal with struggle. In these ways, we can stop the struggle from getting the better of us.

It’s a constant battle, but life is a constant thing. Don’t let it get the better of you.

My three year old niece was grinding some coffee beans in the hand grinder for us. And she kept grinding and grinding, and she wouldn’t stop. She wouldn’t stop because she was going the wrong way. She was trying really hard, but getting nowhere, because the right way took effort she didn’t want to put in.

If you’re going to do something, it’s much better to get somewhere by putting in the effort, than to get nowhere going the wrong way just because it’s easy. That way you’ll have something to show for it.